he saw my "i like bacon" magnet on the fridge and i told him how much i love meat, then we started making out
what a beautiful fairy tale
just ate frosted cheerios in coffee with some marshmellows. the college diet begins
Party at my house. Liquor pinata. Your presence is required.
The guatemalans kept making all these sexual suggestions ... With the corn
Please come fuck me. I had the worst sex of my life the other night and I need to be reminded that sex is actually enjoyable
Yeah i was handcuffed to the bed all night but i actually slept like a baby
She said she was hoping I'd be hotter. I told her I didn't see anybody standing in line to titty fuck her either. She was a great kisser.
I wonder how many people I can tell that he has one nut before he finds out it's me spreading it.
I told him you forbid me to sleep with him so he needs to accept that.
Hi. Tara tells me your sandwiches and stamina are substantial
All you need for a happy life is Jameson and slippers
I woke up with glitter and eggshells in my bed wtf
you know my pussy doesn't know between good and evil
When he identified himself as captain clitoris i knew my night was fucked.
Put my boyfriend in a chastity cage while he was passed out last night. Now I control his orgasms.
Randomize
