no, didnt close...
What?! she made the first move and invited you back to her place. thats like striking out in t-ball pathetic...
But it's a terrible idea. One erection and it's gonna go wrong
it is entirely possible that the police will be knocking on the door in 25 minutes
drunk waterpark is besst waterpark.
VODKAVODKAVODKAYESSSS
Sad Megan is Sad
Have you been drinking my beer?
I think these people may actually be nudists. You know it's bad when I feel uncomfortable.
Dude, you punched me in the face bc I wasnt ordering your tbell fast enough. Then when you got it, you threw it out the window bc, and I quote, "OBAMACAREEEE!"
Well, I dont really know how much penis you have at your disposal so I cant be sure
First encounter with a mirco peen. I was confused when he said he doesnt go down on girls. Cmon dude, practice on a peach.
My cast smells like cheese steak rolls
How was your night?
Fell down a flight of stairs. Went to a sex dungeon. Was approached by a man in a leather harness.
I’m at that point in my trip where I’m kinda hot, kinda cold and I have to remember to breathe.
the sex got boring after the first three hours
holy shit
The bouncer just called me magically delicious... apparently I'm a lucky charm. hollllleeeerrrr!
Randomize
