Why are there hot girls at the dollar store?
The recession has changed everything man.
Someone just asked me to go to the dining hall for dinner and he will use one of his swipes to pay for my meal. i think this is a college version of a date
just as they were cutting his pants off he made em stop & said "everyone knows about shrinkage right".
im wtih 32a right now bc 34d is on her period. now i know how girls feel when their hookups go from magnums to regulars
handjobs have no place on a baseball diamond
My worst case scenario tonight is that I fuck a hot Swiss girl. Let that give you perspective on my life at the moment.
I just had the weirdest moment. Made eye contact at the bar with a girl who has seen my vagina.
You are like the only girl I know who tells their booty call to go find another girl just cause you want more sleep.
Find me a cup with a lid so I can illegally drink in your car. I'll be there in bout 10 minutes.
I had to break it to her that she was not in fact behind the bushes when she peed on the church last night
I threw up in bed last night and tried cleaning it with oldspice and baby powder
Dude, you spit in your shirt pocket saying "I'm saving it for later" then dove head first into the pyramid of beer cans we set up.
She said to call her, so I called her. Her boyfriend answered and traced the fucking call. I could litterally hear him yell because it turns out he lives in 4d
Don't you live in 4c?
Standing naked in my kitchen making nachos. I love my youth.
It's a charity event and she's wearing a cocktail dress drinking a 40... I found my future wife
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