I envy your ability to put any word in front o the word beer and make drinking before 5 sound like a socially sanctioned event.
around noonish you got carried out for spitting water and throwing cups at old people...
Hey, don't feel sorry for me, the two girls in front of me just ordered 18 dollars worth of taco bell. Life could be worse.
You peed in the parking lot while a car was was waiting behind us. And when people walked by you proceeded to say "careful you might slip"
he had the kids march single file in front of us on the way home so they didn't have to watch him pulling me passed out in their wagon...
My judgement was not "clouded". My judgement was in the midst of a fucking hurricane or something ridiculous.
We decided it was acceptable to walk out of class on a quest for Doritos. That high.
Why yes. I did get laid looking like that. My sheets look like there was a clown orgy
Who needs sounds of the ocean? I just fall asleep to whatever chubby he is banging next door.
How the hell could he be confused. He had a naked girl running to him. I feel like he would enjoy that.
THIS MOTHERFUCKING ROOSTER
IT KEEPS CHASING ME BACK IN THE HOUSE
FUCK THIS BIRD
Needless to say, I did not go home with him cause he kinda resembled a guppy fish.
he said "GREAT SCOTT" as he was cumming.
I told him he had to put his dick inside of me at approx 1159 to ensure it was birthday sex. i was 19 when he entered me.. came out 20. winning.
Best single mom victory - getting eaten out in my dodge caravan in the hospital parkade at midnight.Three words: screaming multiple orgasms.
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