In the future we'll all be gay
I saw that some person on TFLN used a bag of wine as a pillow. I tried it last night. I forgot to close the spout. I woke up and thought my face had a period
So I was watching the View and they were saying oral sex is the new goodnight kiss
So when are we having a sleepover?
We're the kind of people who ruin family vacations
A letter to the campus apologizing for being sucha cunt with a picture of her head on it. All posted around campus.
Is waterboarding an exceptable way of getting sober?
She passed out in the backyard, making "face down" snow angels ... so they could have a smile.
And all I wanted you to do is stand there and sing who let the dogs out.
All i know if I'm throwing uo into a bag with a smiley facE on it right now and this is not a smileuy face time right nowe
Text me back. Urgent. It is a porta Keep the portal alive.
Is this the acid talking?
He's not letting me leave till I cum. I am a hostage to my own vagina
we're like the harlem globetrotters of underage drinking
someone commented on last weekends photos impressed that so many homeless people wanted to take pictures with us. weird that those "homeless people" are our friends... right?
I should probably add her on Facebook for as much as I cheat off her in Physics, huh?
But being sober is boring. Everything takes so long, I feel like I'm just waiting in line to die.
Randomize
