i cant finish this easy-mac because i need it for a chaser.
Pass out mid-funnel last night.
boy from dating site added me on facebook. i don't know if i'm ready for him to see what a drunk i am.
its a nice change of pace not blacking out and actually remembering getting laid
Do you think you can get drunk by standing in a tank of vodka if it is seeping into your skin?
Your panties and toothbrush are in your mailbox. just not ready to be with anyone serious. take care.
Theme for your birthday? Beer olympics in S&M costumes? Sounds like a nice little saturday
I don't remember much of half-time. I do remember climbing onto the roof of the fraternity and telling people I was going to stargaze in French.
She needs more friends. Or a second therapist.
Dude my doctor just legit got down on her knees and loudly begged me to do my pap smear
He could only go see Deadpool without his girl if he was black-out drunk... because spoilers. They're the perfect couple.
well we woke up in different beds than the ones we originally fell asleep in, you were butt naked, and your boyfriend was sleeping on a cot in the middle of the kitchen. that might be why he's mad.
Today will be the day I throw up in my backpack in the middle of class
Be careful, there is sex in the air.
sometimes i forget what nice tits i have and then i spend a month brushing my teeth naked in the front of the bathroom mirror, and i remember.
Randomize
