it was terrible. i could've done a better job by myself.
The fact that he is from Canada is way more embarrassing than the fact that you met him on match.com
The liquor store was handing out free shots of some new expensive vodka, but they caught on the fourth time we came back in different outfits. Politics.
would it be completely unacceptable to smoke a cig outside naked? im already doing it so what you say doesn't matter.
No. And Marissa said shitting in the handicap bathroom at work does not get you into the club. You have to shit yourself. She said.
Hey I have your shoes. Do you remember shouting "Police brutality!" when the bouncer was kicking you out last night?
Being home sucks. I haven't drank in like a week. Or smoked cigs. Or done drugs. Or had sex. My body is shutting down.
Omg. It's like you're one of those deprived kids living in a third world country. We need to save you.
I know you're on vacation but you should know I just walk of shamed through a hotel lobby while leaving a threesome on Friday the 13th. Fuck superstition, I win.
Because you stood over the Ice luge screaming STONE COLD and poured beer on everyone
Lets start a coed nudist frat/sorority. It would be amazing. Or just an orgy club. It would also be amazing
Wesley I'm sober and my body hurts. There wasn't much trust in any of those falls.
I've been smoking weed using candles all week and I just found a lighter. This may truly be the happiest moment of my life. It's embarrassing how excited I got
Ok well i was gonna say you can only borrow my fog machine if you will use it to emerge from your room in a cloud of smoke after having sex with sarah, so yeah we're good
This has to be the weirdest conversation I've ever had sober and in the middle of the day before.
I'm bleeding and intoxicated as I'm walking to my final right now. Wish me luck
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