Google if cops ever smoke weeds and then bust them. I need to know immidiately.
I don't know where I am, but its a Goosebumps novel waiting to happen.
Tipsy and thinking of you. Talk tomorrow. My alliteration is awesome.
adderall flavored popcorn. yes we did it and its awesome
He just became a fan of Chelsea Handler on Facebook. WHY DO I ALWAYS PICK THE GAY ONE
i just packed a bowl on a big bird place mat and smoked it in a spaceship with a slide. i love babysitting.
He had a beer bottle in each of his back pockets and was on rollerblades. All I remember is following him for about 10 minutes
the best thing about long term relationship is that the fact that i bothered to shave my legs today counts as a valentines gift
Oh my god, I totally forgot we call your penis "Godzilla's Tail".
Trying to figure out if the guy I'm with right now is the same guy I met spring break
Oh duude it is the guy from spring break! Awk.
Let's fuck under the stars. And by under the stars I mean in my bed underneath my glow in the dark star stickers.
Found out my grandpa had two wives and found out I'm eligible for some internships 11/10 would do acid again.
Also, full disclose I puked in a fruit barrel box
I'm kinda glad you won't be in Vegas tomorrow because you'd make us go streaking or throw dead animals at them.
we used a blowdryer last night to warm up our left over pizza..it worked perfectly at first..but then the chili powder got into his eyes..
Randomize
