do u think i could put an abortion on my debit card?
you know you should just kill yourself when you are helping your 16 year-old sister get ready for a date and you're going out to dinner with you parents..
NoDDING MY HEAD LIKE uyuEAH MOViUNG MY HiPS LioKe YEAhhhhhhhhhhh
wow.
I wanna get so drunk next week I throw up on a guy's genitals. I want to be that memorable for someone.
i'm drinking with a bunch of phds, i feel very stupid but good about my drinking abilities
I take back everything bad I said about that song party in the usa. There's just something about seeing a cross dresser lipsing it that makes a song sooo much better.
Nothing quite says America like barbecue and beer at 9 in the morning.
we marched down beaver avenue with lit tiki torches humming the olympics opening song.
WHY AM I ALWAYS DEFEATED BY THE LATIN COCK?!?!
He's both a cowboy and a firefighter. Saying "no" was not an option.
Pack light, we're going straight to bar from the train. No place to put our shit.
Dude all I'm bringing is my dick and a phone charger.
All I do lately is eat steak, drink warm beer, watch porn, and avoid booty calls when I'm too lazy to take a shower. I think the apocalypse turned me into a dude.
It was like coming out my mothers vagina again in slow motion
I looked like a tiger in heat. He didn't know if I wanted to fuck him or eat him.
Dude they are making elephants out of dollar bills. I'm way too high for this
Randomize