he is a creepy guy.
yea thats what heroine does to ppl.
The sign in front of ihop says "designated drivers get half off their order"
i definitely just woke up with half of a cigarette tucked underneath my balls. Last night must have been interesting
He offered but I said no. I didn't think it'd be cool to accept cupcakes in the mens room of a gentlemans club.
i remember too much of last night for it to have been successful
A three fingered guy just showed up with fireworks and bourbon, tonight will be entertaining.
she is legit wearing a plastic bag around her neck as a necklace. she says it serves two purposes.
it wasn't a normal cookie, i figured that out 45 minutes into my exam
This breakup hit defcon 5. Walked to pathmark with a denim jacket over my nightgown to get ben and jerrys. On sale btw.
Well then sir I'll probably see you tomorrow after my class and at 3 with your clothes off. Sounds like a solid way to start the weekend to me
I'm kinda surprised he wouldn't be honored to take me back as a fuck buddy.
They just broke the window so they could get in and smoke the taxi driver out...
A warmed up burrito and jelly beans. The breakfast of champions.
He stopped me mid blowjob and asked me to take off my hat. He said it made him feel like Neil Young was going down on him.
Eh, it could have been worse. I may or may not have been wearing a jedi cloak while getting my dick sucked.
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