i havent had this much fun since the last time i farted and it created a boner.
She started to tell me how she goes to a shrink, so I started thinking how to sneak out of her place, then she said part of it was for her sex addiction, long story short she's got her clit peirced n I just got laid
Isn't the perk of being in a relationship not having to put in effort for sex?
he matches the description of mystery hookup #2, 4, and 7
Although I love the reason it was done, can you maybe not show pictures of my dick to all your friends at parties? I like to present my penis in my own special way. thanks
I'm sure me singing - rather loudly - "fuck me in the back seat" last night didn't help either.
In other more interesting news I'm going to arrange a surprise orgy. You in?
You kept running up to married couples, taking their pictures and begging for them not to get divorced
As I read your response saying I need a tan before I can become a go-go dancer, a girl cane up to work and gave me 10 coupons for 100 days of tanning for a dollar.
This is fate. You were destined to be a stripper.
You very well can't change your mind now. It would upset the natural flow of life.
dying me prepared for dead me... i woke up with my laptop open to the last snl episode, a bottle of gatorade, advil and a bag of chocolate all next to me
it's pizza time hurry your sexcapades
I put miralax in my rum/coke. Go hard or go home.
I just had a dream that I was fighting Donald Trump... Gotta stop watching the news before bed
AMAZON SELLS SEX SWINGS!
i realized my signature handshake has now become a hookup. i love what college has done to me.
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