I'm playing musical beds - it's not very fun
Packed at 6 am completely wasted. Damage assessment: 12 pairs of socks (no underwear), a flashlight, 3 shorts, shot glass, 8 sweaters, puff paint, one sneaker.
You were so hammed, you asked your buddy in Economics to plot a demand curve for Parmesan Cheese.
Its 11am everyones wasted wearing sombreros and eating fresh produce..cesar chavez would be very proud
And for your info. Don't pee outside with glow sticks. People will still see you.
we ended up on her 9 year old brothers bed and he saw the whole thing.... now he will know how to use his equipment
He called the drink "The Annexation of Puerto Rico". He wouldn't tell us whats in it but said that we should all fear for our lives. Let's do this.
So after this weekend I think I'm gonna go down on one knee and propose to my boyfriend that he give me his liver.
You stumbled in at 10am, half-clothed and still drunk from last night and yelled "well, its not called a walk of pride!", then passed out on the couch.
Hey, i turned the toilet into a water fountain. Drink up.
Im going..... Drinking all day and hand jobs from 18yr old emo rich girls that are just trying to get back at mom and dad for being to protective...SOLD
He walked into the pizza shop... Pulled the fire alarm.. And proceeded to dance to it...
How the fuck did we end up at a strip club last night.. We started the night playing bingo at a church
So his dick was definitely bigger than it looked in all the pictures he sent my daughter.
So not only did I get laid today but I also left with a 42” tv lol
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