oh god the rape fog is back!
just saw a guy throwing up in the urinal at Dennys. Either he had one hell of last night or we are going to eat somewhere else
I miss your penis. And I totally say this as a friend. I just miss it because it's great. You should be very proud of it.
you made sure to tell everyone that the amount of people you had slept with was actually quite low, especially when the size of your breasts was taken into account
I have a meeting at work in an hour, I'm so hungover going outside is NOT happening there are roads and shit I'll totally get myself killed.
Instead of medicine they should just give ecstasy. Also I'm tingly and can't find u guys. A gay man just said he loved me... :( / :)
There was no eligible dick at the ER. I'm pissed. Looks like "Searching for Strange at the Local Free Clinic" is a no go for the name of our first full length album. On the other hand, I got a dilaudid shot and I no longer feel like I have the worst bladder infection of my life.
Who ever is in the stall next to me is crying and it sounds like they're doing massive amounts of blow too. Finals for your ass huh.
my dad is now demonstrating how to start a fire with a tampon. happy fucking new year!
Fucking holidays. How do I have this many men who want to fuck me and none of them are available when I'm ready to blow my top?
I just had a sex dream about orange juice, so there's that.
Sent him a nude and I forgot to crop out the Jesus picture in the background. The Catholic guilt is too real.
She showed up at 4:30 in the morning HAMMERED, stripped, demanded sex, then after 4 failed attempts stopped me mid-thrust to tell me she thought we should be fucking for a cause, like animal rights. Process that for a second. She wanted us to be fucking for animal rights.
I lick assholes and I wouldn't eat mdma
Apparently when you start crushing adderall and blending them into your margaritas calling them blenderalls you have "a problem" WTF
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