yea i came on her face and told her to bring a snorkel next time
her underwear stopped being sexy when i saw her pubes sticking out of the top.
Does my status still say I suck cocks? I don't know how to change it
he has officially spend more money on me than any other boy. and its all gone to plan b. awesome.
Sit down my child. It's time you were told of my famous loss-of-virginity story entitled, "The Penis that Never Could."
You left wolverine marks
I'm somewhere between sorry and proud
My dad used the quotation mark gesture with his hands when he asked how my "roommate" was doing.
That may be because I drunkenly sent him a pick of you two curled up together like kittens. Two very buff kittens.
I just want to lay in a bed of egg mcmuffins and cry
I asked Tony because I knew he wouldn't give me a lecture about consequences
???? Tony IS a lecture about consequences
Of course, you have to give the courtesy text like last night when I told you my dick was gonna smell like peppermint
I've just had my first cup of coffee in a month and I moaned at the first drink and honestly I think this is the most sexual expreiance in 6 months
My potted cactus died. I am literally less nurturing than the desert.
You kept licking my face. You said you were making sure I was real.
It will pretty much be equal to the feeling I had when you let me hold your dick while you were peeing, or when I graduated high school!
I told you I couldn't sleep because of the speed and you rolled over and replied "shh. just pretend."
Randomize
