Also do the "tongue the pee-hole" thing.
Saved 180 Bucks tonight. Pulled my own tooth. More money to party with.
I have a fruit stripe tattoo on my penis. You're the only person I know who chews that gum.
I just tried to pee in a pad to see if it was like a diaper. it's not.
Well, let's be honest here. You're dealing with gay guys... EVERYTHING has an emotional attachment.
She greeted me with a new giants jersey and an opening day blowjob. this is true love.
Freshman ate returning to campus. Let Operation Slut Storm commence.
Agreed. That's like a marriage. For better or worse, till death do us part. I will hold your head over a toilet
I woke up naked under desk at her apt once during my freshman year. I should have known that friendship was of a different breed...
OMG BTW REMEMBER HOW HE ORDERED PIZZA THAT ONE TIME WE HOOKED UP. APPARENTLY HE WAS HANDING IT OUT TO PEOPLE WHO LIVE IN MY BUILDING AS HE WAS LEAVING
I just conveyed my whole sex life to my mom over voicemail. Anddd, I'm hammered.
Top night. Top night.
We got hammered last night and I woke up this morning with texts from 'iron maiden chick.' wtf?
Woke up at 10 with bourbon being shoved down my throat and him yelling, "shot train! Don't be a bitch"
I think my life is a one-way ticket to blackout city.
I would cock slap so many things if I had a cock.
Randomize
