would you ever date a girl who drove an 89 Chrysler LeBaron? - for the record it's a convertable
i found a dude playing guitar on the portapotty
Everyone just saw your hickey on TV and on the jumbotron at the hockey game.
Thanks dad.
I hate babysitting girls whose boobs are bigger than mine.
I fucked him in the bathroom at Cedar Point. if it hadn't been for me already combining my two favorite things in the world the whole bathroom thing would have been a little disgusting.
Howd you meet this guy?
I found him next to my pants on sunday morn.
You were wasted and fell in a pond when you met him, it's not like you were on top of your game
I'm blazed about to take my 8am final. Another girl is too. We just looked each other in the eyes. She's my soul sister.
Just saw two dudes run across the street carrying a mini keg and a scaled model of the empire state building. Missed this town
I just want to know what horrible accidents of evolution allowed that tiny penis to exist
New favorite drinking game: bobbing for jello shots. Where did these freshmen come from and when can we go there?
Want a slice of this weekend's hottest piece of ass?
it wasn't a total waste of time; I mean how often do you get to play scotch pong?
.....fair enough
Listen, you eat the donut. I eat you out. Everybody wins.
you said you were going to the bathroom. we found you an hour later laying in the backyard clutching a bottle of vodka while singing the beatles and crying
Randomize
