remember the good old days of high school when a half gal would last for more than a nite
TOMORROW NIGHT CAN I HOLD YOU LIKE A BABY
My cock is literally on the edge of falling off. Fuck Vegas.
and I keep making him eat me out and buying me presents, this is paradise. I wish he cheated on me earlier.
Well, for starters, she called the condom a "dick mask."
I threw up in a Buffalo Wild Wings and then got a high-five. I really don't understand America
I think we need to stage an Intervention. Her Instagram is a call for help.
Well i would have gone to the bar but Satan decided to hold his rituals in my uterus.
Just broke into a house and crawled through a window. Upside: getting laid.
I didn't know White Castle was open when your sober.
Yeah we fucked. I ran into her the next day, I had to pick up the girl scout cookies I ordered from her boyfriends kids.
Help I can't tell if I'm sexually attracted to Bill Nye
Oh.
You came to the right person.
There's nothing wrong with using cocaine to keep my heart rate up in my fitness class.
Is it wrong to want to have sex with one guy who's good in bed before going out on a date with a guy I actually like?
I can't be held responsible for what I do for you after a blowjob like that.
Randomize
