why is there a sandwich nailed to the wall
it was better than the time i puked and I forgot to open the lid of the toilet
he's having a long distance Facebook-coordinated power hour. the status update has 159 comments ...
I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.
He keeps asking where i got my clothes and accessories. i'm not sure if he wants to fuck me, or go shopping.
It's going to be great. They guy at the store said 3 shots and you won't be able to feel your face or stop smiling.
he passed out on the stove with a cup in his hand. yes the pictures are hilarious
You're barking up the wrong lesbian.
he just made me do "this little piggy" to his toes.
Saw a guy in a chef outfit covered in mustard talking jiberish into his phone running across the skywalk.
I kinda feel like I was hit by a Prius. Just glad it's not bus status.
i'm face down in a ditch right now please help this is not a metaphor for my life this is real.
All I know is I got on a table at late night and sang gotta go my own way
Ok fine, yes she's pregnant. But you're ignoring the most important part. HER BOOBS GOT BIGGER. That doesn't happen every day, and I owe it to myself to enjoy those boobs before the belly catches up to them!
Remeber when we went camping and fucked those two guys? Yeah me either but I'm covered in poison oak so I'm guessing it's from that.
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