I plan on putting pajamas back on after I shower. Today is going to be awesome.
so I told him I hadn't been laid since Bush was president. Right after he cums, he says "Welcome to the Obama Administration".
just threw up in the bus full of other international students just outside of boulder, just keeping the aussie reputation alive
she found me naked passed out on the toilet and i just kept repeating "i'm like elvis, but not dead."
Do you think the party boat will still go out if there is a hurricane?
Soo time for a life change, my 6 yr old sister made my gf a puke bucket for her birthday
I jumped on his cock in 2 seconds flat. Thanks mom for sending me to gymnastics when I was a kid.
I don't know which part of you thought this was funny but it's fucked up to wake up in that much fluff and now we don't have a couch. Fuck you.
I will give you 100$, a blow job a day for a month and I will shave my legs according to societal standards until next November if you come recuse me from my night class right NOW.
Look, I'm just saying... paying ur respects to the neighbors who had a death in the family with food u steal from the neighbors having the cookout may result in a negative karma situation.
I look like shit btw. Like the joker from Batman.
I'm not sure how that's possible unless you put on face paint. Which I would respect.
Running my fingers through my hair was like that scene in Patch Adams where the old lady got to swim in a pool of pasta. I love Molly.
Jessica just ate her lipstick. That's how the night is going
We both know we're cheating on one another. But our side pieces aren't as kinky as us...so yeah, we're still together. This is a fucked up relationship.
Did April legit get married in a parking lot?
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