I have to start avoiding pregnant women. This is getting out of hand.
Do you know how hard it is to masturbate with a runny nose?
I just read the lonely terrorist on nwa had 40 more friends than me on facebook
90 persent of me said don't pee on that fake plant. Buyt i did
Desperately trying not to throw up over the side of the ferry back to CT. Can't be the first one of the season.
Confirmed. Vegetarians give terrible head.
broke the door off of my fridge tryin to have a indoor rodeo
ALL CAPS CUZ ITS SERIOUS SHAME.
tried to out drink an american air force weapons loader. never again
I just had really awesome sex bent over the side of an air hockey table. That is all. Happy thanksgiving.
No cash. I had to buy four bowls of soup to meet the credit card limit. I'm not even upset. SO MUCH SOUP.
Figured out why that fly won't leave. It keeps buzzing through my weed smoke
Fly high, Fly.
Me and some girl at the bar just high fived for not wearing bras
I've peed in two sinks in the past two weeks. No one should be able to say that.
The room got awkwardly silent right as i yelled "leave him alone! I know plenty of straight guys who like to suck dick!"
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