you keep denying me to hang out, should i take a hint?
you keep asking me after midnight, should i take a hint?
Going to spend my cab money on more shots and just take the ambulance home
I have 11 glasses of water and one beer on the table infront of me. Have to keep going to different bartends to get more. There are only two though and I think they've caught on
I have a question, if it paid really well, like ridiculously well, would you be a restaraunts under the table resident blowjob girl?
Plotting your own moral demise should not be this fun
Does the blue bra belong to your sister or cousin?
In other words, he somehow found his way to my apartment, wasted, and was naked on my new couch. Completely naked. It was too special to pass up.
This milkshake tastes better than sex. Priorities, I have them.
I'll just have to do enough fangirling for the both of us. Nipples engaged.
We did a lot of coke and Bedazzled the couch. It seemed like a good idea at the time.
Can't you just imagine you've grudge fucked me so we can get past this?
Got head at the top of a water slide over-looking the valley while wearing a sombrero and drinking a corona. Epic.
You have to get it done early. Like a dick drive by. Hit it and run.
Now just crop his dad out and add it to the spank bank.
Who knew she had talents apart from chugging wine spritzers
Randomize
