Was i wearing a white blazer when you superpoke danced me??
conclusion of the day: americans need to get on tredmills, people need to learn how to flush toliets and learn how to pee in then instead of on them, and waiters shouldnt tell their life stories to customers.
I feel like Captain Blackout doesn't do her justice. Brigadier General Blackout is much better.
I have way too much money in my bra to be responsible.
Hey I never found my wallet but i did find a bag of 14 soft taco supremes
I have your wallet. Trade you for the tacos.
Sorry about last night..I didnt realize how drunk you were and when I closed the door it caused you to slam into the mirror...you'll probably piece together the puzzle when you read this and see your hand.
Drunk. The frashmen love me. Give them. Toilrt paper. And shiots
Just slept with a female bodybuilder. not cute. but it was like fucking hulk hogan with a twat. Beastly.
im so disgusted with myself. funny thing was i lasted 15 seconds. she benches 325
The party went downhill once the fire department had to be called to put out the kitchen fire.
I AM COVERED IN FAKE BLOOD AND REAL CUM. I AM AWESOME
I just screamed IM THE CHUPACABRA and jumped on his dick. I need to evaluate my life choices.
He was awesome with her today. I can't say that it didn't make my Fallopian tubes sing "The Hills Are Alive."
He asked if we were going to take advantage of his drunken state. When we said no he tired to show us what we were missing out on. It was so sad it almost made him cute.
it's like my eyeball is being humped by my eyelid
Would the comment "Down Goes Frasier" be too inappropriate at this time?
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