The guy asked if i had a problem w/set schedules
He walked in, tore open the drawer, pulled out a condom, and slammed it shut. He was that ready.
Worst walk of shame everrr. Hopefully the thought of me walking 20 minutes in the freezing cold with someone else's sweatpants, a bra on & high heels will cheer you up today.
Oh god there are people jogging. Fuck off productive people, you don't know me.
He called me piss drunk at 7:30pm while cooking bacon and said he was going to bed. I don't think he's taking it well.
THANK YOU for not letting me make out with that girl omfg I was one step away from a foursome in the handicapped stall
Stormed out of the house in frustration and now I'm in public and have to take a rage dump. Today sucks.
we could do so many fantastic illegal things together. sexually and otherwise.
Finally liberated my Star Trek DVD from my booty call's house. Captain Kirk would be so proud.
Does this mean I have to put a bra on now
I slept on her porch...in her dads handcuffs
He was like the most intimidating looking guy you've seen in your life except he was really shittily doing the two step
When you trip so hard that you can see your friends thoughts through their pupils.
duddde i wasn't even home last night and someone elses clothes are on my floor and there glow sticks everywhere?!
Last night we proved the theory that "harder" is the worst rough sex safe-word ever.
Having a bangable neighbor is going to ruin my booty call game. I refuse to go across town for dick now
Randomize
