I think getting shot is the thing to do in Brooklyn
Blew in her face. She is Pissed. Yahtzee. As she brushes her teeth.
He tried to pick up a girl by telling her about his homosexual experience in high school.
she "accidentally" hit me with her car, its almost as if she know im fucking her boyfriend.
I don't remember much but I know I looked hot.
Putting the night light in my bathroom cabinet was the best idea ever. Awesome for puking while light sensitive
I feel like "stop licking my face" isn't something that needs to be repeated twice
Every concussion has its silver lining
Cute underage boy is in my house.
OH MY GOD. DON'T DO ANYTHING. WHY IS HE IN YOUR HOUSE.
Dad had me doing shots of chocolate mint Everclear last night. I've never felt closer to him.
She walked out and announced that he was now part of our confused, incestuous, glorious eskimo family. I've never been more proud.
Campus is too small for this to keep happening
I've orgasmed four times in the past 24 hours. And my mom's dropping off cookies later
Random one night stand with a guy that had a USA tattoo on his ass. Can't possibly get more American than that
I just bumped into this random I hooked up with a few years ago at Steve's party. Talk about a fingerblast from the past!
She was a cheerleader in college and President of her sorority and now she’s a sales rep for a pharmaceutical corporation. “High maintenance hot” doesn’t even begin to explain it
But dear lord is it worth it
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