Seriously, I'd take them all over any of the milfs here...and you know how much that means coming from me
wtf. i just found you're porn stash.
u like it?
NOT THE POINT.
I had five suicidal voicemails from him when I woke up this morning. They all started and ended with "DON'T FUCK MY ROOMMATES".
It was only one, it doesn't count.
he's wearing our apron and eating a pb and oreo sandwich. and calling the oreos "topless" since he took their tops off...
oh awks just saw the head of medical staff who I punched the bottle of wine at
I don't care how hot he got, I can't get past the PTSD flashbacks of the first time he fingered me
Is it possible to have pulled a muscle in my neck from passing out with my head in a bucket?
Is there a fine for having sex in the back of a zipcar?
Sounds like sex on a twister board.
An idea that is both hilarious and intriguing...
Bon Iver should never be played when you just ate shrooms.
The only thought that went through my head was "that would be an absolute disaster" so of course I said yes
You know he really cares when he gives you one of those on-the-go toothbrushes for your walk of shame before running to work
I’m not closing myself off the to the possibility of making a bad life choice.
Well, he kept asking me if I was going to murder him once we got upstairs. It sort of killed the mood.
If you survived your 72 hour masturbation marathon put on some pants and come over. My mom dropped off a lasagna.
Randomize
