i fell asleep last night with fifteen animal crackers in my mouth. rock bottom dude.
I wish I had my old roomstes number so I could send him pictures from lastnight... I had a blast banging his "true love" now that I think about it we're even don't worry about that gas bill you didn't pay. Ur girl worked it off!
Any toy can be an adult toy. Location, location, location.
and then he said that the only reasonable explanation as to why I got swine flu was because all I ever do is join the bandwagon
Dude, he sent me a pic of his dick. I thought dating a married man wouldn't remind me so much of high school. Seriously.
I'm still trying to decide if it's a complement when he said "I'd like to subscribe to your daddy issues".
You can come over, sure. But I'll be watching college hockey during the blow job.
We woke up under the ping pong table holding hands.
He knows my period schedule but not my work schedule.
I told him we couldn't hang out because I had strep, he said he's had it once so he couldn't get it again. The sex isn't worth this level of stupidity
just go where the car takes you. fingers crossed its here with breakfast.
She bent over while grinding on me on the dance floor and her thong straps were hanging out, I thought it was a good idea to grab the straps with both hands and pretend to be riding in Santa's sleigh...not my brightest moment.
My car windows are covered in lube. Happy 4th of July!
my human sexuality class is the only class where the porn i watch the night before is relevant to the discussion the next day
I just mixed tangerine juice with sauv blanc. on an unrelated note, my episide of intervention is slated to run in April.
Randomize
