Oral text is very safe with the right protection.
Why does Jon Cryer have a career?
That is a good question.
If Amber from Teen Mom can get a new boyfriend, so can I.
i just kept saying he was red & i was blue and we couldnt become purple. I started crying at one point
I just remembered our "im drunk enough to look at your vagina" conversation. Is that offer still valid? I really think I need a second opinion
HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO LOOK FUCKABLE IN AN ALL NEON SPANDEX JUMPSUIT?
FYI If I die in my sleep it is because I drank a bottle of coke from 1986. I needed a mixer
You dont lie about slip and slides
Tonight, I'll be cleaning. And by cleaning, I mean drinking booze and spraying everything with Febreze.
You have like just as much sex as me and I have a brand new bf. That does not add up. That is not right.
I look like slutty woodland creatures dress me in the morning. Everybody's got problems.
my vagradar is going off.. it smells a soldier
Iron Man just asked me back to his place... Not sure I can handle this. Wish me luck.
You know you have a problem when your man yells at you that his penis is not your personal play toy.
I'm too pretty to go to jail. Especially in Louisiana.
Randomize
