People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
When are you freeeeeeeeee?
My phone auto corrected that to freeeeeeeeeedoooooooooom. That's kinda awesome.
he asked me to eat out his asshole. after five minutes of uncomfortable staring i realized he was serious.
she literally pooped in the closet. i sent the picture to everyone i know.
well, I suppose if I had to pick a penis to represent the american public, yours would be it
So can you tell me who's underwear is on the cat?
I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
some fat dude with wolverine facial hair just walked out of your room with a snuggie. explanation needed.
Ps I just used the "If you give a mouse a cookie" defense in a real life situation. Suck it
im In safeway buying a bottle of Ciroc in short shorts at 3:00 pm on a Monday, yeah I don't know either.
All I've done for this 11 hour car ride is kegel and listen to our sex playlist so your dick better be good and ready
In unrelated news guys should not ask what I'm doing/wearing if they can't handle an honest answer. I'm not pretending I'm not sitting on the couch in yoga pants watching Community so you can beat off.
I feel like a dancer trapped in the body of a math instructor. Love, Mom
The shower rod just came down while I was pooping. I caught it though and the curtain stayed on, so I'm not sure if it's a good or bad omen for the rest of my day
Laying in bed naked is fun. I now see why guys love boobs... They're sooo bouncy! This long distance relationship is really killing my sex life.
Randomize
