i think i have reached a jessica simpson level of regret
Lets go to the mall and pick up some fat chicks and take them out tonight so we can be the skinny friends
lol earlier she was acting like a normal gf... and then BANG! shes touching herself again...
Everyone is slow dancing to Aerosmith. I am serenading a slice of pizza.
I don't remember anything that happened last night past 10.. I made him buy me a Buckeye's Donut tshirt. I have no idea why he'd want to fuck me after that.
Do you think you could handle being our babysitter if we roofied ourselves for fun??
my mom called me mid shot and i accidentally answered and kept calling her my own name. somehow i thought that would help the situation.
80% sure the drag queens carried her home
if i don't get grease into my system pronto i will undoubtedly die
I feel better now, I have multiple fuck buddies again
I just had sex on my divorce papers. I've never felt so poetic.
Found a trail of Taco Bell hot sauce packets through the garage to our back door and cheese in my bra. I'll say it was a successful Sunday Funday.
Being forward is somethimes a problems. Like in sexual deity Kong.
I think you’re losing coherence.
I am
For the record, if you sneeze while you have a dildo in your vagina and you dont have a good grip on it, that thing can get some distance.
I promise I won't bug you anymore, I just need the following things at your convenience but preferably soon: my earrings, cup, and panties. Thanks. Good talk.
Randomize
