Glitter + Penis = Best. Idea. Ever.
brittany murphy hurts far more than michael jackson, patrick swayze, etc because i never masturbated to any of those other people
arguing about whether his trip to england or my trip on acid was better
Is moral bankruptcy something you need to file for?
Its time to go balls to the wall to get any good D during these last few weeks of college.
so, give him that "thank you for fighting for my freedom bj" & he wont even remember what you said in that six min voice mail.
Just got walked in on while fucking in the lounge in the performing arts building. The janitors gave us five minutes to leave and applauded our exit
I just gave an orange Froot Loop the finger for falling on the floor instead of my mouth when I was pouring a mini box of cereal into my face.
We'll just charge in there, all pant less and fabulous demanding he give back her ferret.
I say this as a friend, you would make a SPECTACULAR crossdresser
i wear a size 32DD bra. its basically impossible for me to get a speeding ticket
Everytime I try to keep track of the amount of people I slept with I always forget about that guy I met on the dc metro, where I woke up to him organizing his Special K and Molly and I was covered in sleeping cats.
We could get her a gift basket of Xanax l
That was the first time ive ever slept with a girl with a q in her name
We somehow ended up in Oklahoma. Nick's been crapping for two hours and I'm afraid to call a doctor because who the hell knows what sort of stuff goes down in the middle of nowhere. So not a great long weekend really.
Randomize