I think the only thing that impresses me are nice penises...and Jesus. Jesus would impress me. Especially if he walked on water again.
benefit of terrorism--they won't let you buy random one way plane tickets to random parts of the country for no reason nonmatter how high you are.
i got a blow job in the bathroom during intermission at the hockey game. i'm pretty sure i made Canada proud.
dizzyuy bat. 3.453 lkos. hoit sx, now im single. blackouteed
I had my first sober conversation with his roommate. I remembered half way through that the first time we met I was getting fucked on his counter
Dude she has starbursts in her sports bra. I feel like this is counter productive.
Advice for you. Never grate cheese on your counter then not cleanup the scraps, then have your bf over and endup having sex on the counter. Theres literally cheese melted in and around my ass.
So my Mom pointed out my vibrator on the night stand next to my stun gun and reminded me of how much I drink.
I want to fuck the side burns off of Steve.
I haven't even had my coffee yet and you're being slutastic
you know that australian accents are like the bat signal to my vagina
"He's not as cute as he was last week" and "I'm not as drunk as I was last week" are basically the same sentence.
I just found a nug casually in my room under my duffel bag. Is this a sign I need help?
He told me that I should keep my socks on next time because he read somewhere that it'll help me orgasm...
also. when i get a car, the amount of space there is for sex WILL be a huge deciding factor.
Randomize
