If she sees it and stops hooking up w/ me then you owe me
Totally saw a hot amputee. I think this is called character growth.
question: masturbation: how much is too much? I think i'm about to tip toe a fine line
After 10 years all I have gotten is one bra pic, at this point I should be able to draw your cervix from memory
im covered in puffy paint and glitter i cant find kevin and im wearing shoes that dont belong to me....come get me please
She introduced herself and then asked "have you ever fucked a girl with a cast?"
We saw a kid playing in poison ivy. We walked away, he'll learn his lesson.
I'm never telling my kids not to take ecstasy, never. Idk what my mom was thinking.
We name dropped you at the liquor store and got a ten percent discount!
Our new roommate is sitting in the living room wearing a snuggie and clutching a handle of burnett's mixed with what appears to be crystal light and sobbing over a documentary about a dead race horse.
I know. Isn't she utterly fantastic?
I am the slutty bisexual glue that holds this friendship group together.
i think he spiked my sandwich with a viagra
he says he is going to get you very high and make you leave the country with him
possibly by boat
I want to get "Patrick Kane" wasted tonight
I am one hundred percent down for that
I think I kinda scared him when I tried to wrap his snake around his dick while he was trying to nap.
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