i woke up to see him pissing on your n64. thats like killing a unicorn. punishable by death for sure.
me and my sister are feeding my dog poprocks. this is proof you don't need a lot of money to have fun.
I think the world might be a better place if everyone was capable of having open relationships.
It totally doesn't make me a groupie if I hooked up with him before he was in the Olympics
So at what point do I tell her that I like fucking these hot southern girls more than I like my relationship with her?
Were betting on little kids falling and racing for a drinking game at the wedding.
about 90% sure I fell off a roof. It hurts BAD. Don't suppose you're still in town?
yup haha I infact DID fall off a roof. Want some bomb ass omlettes?
I blew him and did charles barkley impressions at the same time. what a pro
dude, you were feeling up her boob for 20 minutes in front of the guy she was hitting on because you and her had an argument over who had bigger boobs.
hey man, it was for science okay.
just almost had a panic attack because i couldn't find the granola bar i put in my purse. i miss klonopin.
I'm sure there's been a weekend in 2014 we were sober... Clearly it wasn't fun, bc I can't recall it. Point proven, alcohol is key.
If he would've shaved his beard when we first broke up, getting over him would've been so much simpler. That asshole.
I've peed in two sinks in the past two weeks. No one should be able to say that.
What did you give up for lent?
Diet and excersize. And I'm never going back...
Here's a rundown of my night alone. Danced my ass off in the kitchen to FleetmacWood. Drank a little bit. Ordered $40 worth of Chinese food once the drinks kicked in. Picked up said Chinese in dirty sweatpants and slippers. #livinglife
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