Define "chronic" masturbator.
I should have bought two bottles, she left before I could feel her tits...
After she swallowed she let out a hurge burp. No BS. I'm the cock of the walk.
I think you have the wrong number. But at any rate, respect.
Quick, to the slutcave!
September 16th, captains log. I awoke in a daze, not sure of my location
Let me begin my 3 part apology by saying that you are a wonderful human being...
All she was asking was for you to describe your coat so she could get it, but you kept yelling at her so the security threw you out.
At one point, you closed your eyes and asked me which 'six flags' we were at
You were a path of destruction, you started with eating half the cake, proceeded by throwing the rest in the sink and dumping water all over it while laughing... then throwing the drunk helmet across the room yelling that you didnt want to wear it... i'd say it was a successful birthday.
I WAS JUST SITTING HERE BEING SNIFFED BY ODD WOMEN FOR A SOLID 5 MINUTES. My face was a twist of utter fear and confusion...
I've actually, minus lsat night have actually changed my drinking habits
think of it as grooming, as if he is my Kate Middleton and I'm grooming him to be a presentable princess
Take a shit and have a hit. It's the Sunday Funday Rule.
I was "singing along to the Lego Movie" high. Everything was not awesome
I think I just received the most dignified proposition of my life. From the father of the bride. Who'd have thought.
Randomize
