***** fucked a guy with one hand last night
i overslept, had to take a cab to the train station, might puke, bought the wrong flavored vitamin water, and mj's dead. what a terrible world to wake up to.
when she asked me if it was possible to swim under north america i knew it was time to leave.
Please tell me why 'cock-a-thon' was auto saved in my phone.
My mouth holds just enough water for my bong
I am sitting on the couch "eating" a frozen big bucket margarita with a spoon.
I inadvertently smoked 6 blunts at one time. We just kept passing them around...I didn't know what happened until it was over. I can't walk.
They told you that you couldn't fit in the dryer. Man, did they eat their words. You did brake the door though.
Well my dad thinks I wake up at 3 or 4 am every day. Really it is just all the booty calls, but I'm glad he thinks I am so motivated
That's awesome and prob the first time you had an idea of what to do. I'm super proud of you Chelz
Its cos im stoned ! My high self is maturing
Would it be weird if I congratulated the guy who almost broke up my marriage for working on the marriage equality bill? You know, thanks for fighting for the sanctity of marriage. Weird, right?
I'm tired of being known as the Great Giver Goddess of the Almighty Pity Bone.
tried to suck my ex boyfriends dick last night at a bar... Happy homecoming from me to you
Not sure how my purse ended up in the bushes last night... Or why there was a noodle strainer in the toilet.
On a scale of one to 10 how Risky is it to sleep with a married man (all morals set aside)
Randomize
