fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
Jon just got arrested by the quesadilla police
What?!?
What I actually meant, is I had a quesadilla, and Jon got arrested by the real police
They need a stunt cock, be about 20 more minutes.
Idea for the cake. Joints for candles. Do it.
His words said "save me", but his penis said "I'll take my chances"
She told me I made the cut, and to write my name and number on the white board by the door. I was the 7th number down.
You went home with a man in a loincloth
I just watched him leave in half a loincloth. Don't you just love Halloween???
I also like to call Halloween "Mystery Fuck Day"
Went into Walmart to get a pregnancy test. Came out with a beta fish and chocolate.
I just walked past a guy banging a chick in the back of his car.
I know this is super early in advance but can I borrow your horse mask on 4/20
Just had to stop myself from doing a bump on the Disney bus. The struggle is real.
Your phone just changed "liver" to "liquor" how dose that make you feel
I swear if you laugh while im moaning i will immediately stop and go home.
my grocery list today consisted of condoms. and butter.
umm... whats the butter for?
Randomize
