weed, chlorine, and victory. my bed smells like i had sex with michael phelps.
Her boobs more than make up for all the flaws with her personality.
Lost gin update. Blackout me found and re-hid the bottle. Left a note to myself saying, "GOOD LUCK, SUCKER!"
Almost propositioned sex in exchange for a study guide for my final tomorrow.
Security said no more parties of this kind. To me that translates to Theme party this weekend.
Sorry I sent so many blank messages. My hands are slippery. Don't ask why.
Do you remember calling me a cuntasaurus rex last night?
Remember that time we became friends because I shotgunned a Tall Boy in your bathroom?
Those memories are both hazy and awesome.
I think we've reached the point in the summer were we need to go back to school. I was so bored yesterday I nearly bought blow dart gun.
So many weird people in this class. I can practically taste their unwanted virginities. They taste bad.
I think I'm pregnant again.
or as we call it, thursday.
I'm pretty sure the rest of my evening will consist of masturbating, drinking tequila and watching children's movies.
I'm drunk listening and crying to Selena. How's your Monday?
the next morning we realized we didnt speak the same language... guess i subconsciously did learn a little german last semester. thanks study abroad.
ah the experiences a semester in Vienna can give you. Frau would enjoy knowing that even while sleeping during class you still managed to learn enough german to get laid
So you completely disappeared from my memory last night at about my 15th Jager bomb. But only you. No one else.
Randomize
