Oh. He liked you.
Then you said "Are you asian?, I didn't know there was Asians in Colorado."
you freaked out because you thought your face lotion was cum in a bottle
I promise you I could read that dogs mind, he was arguing with the other dog saying he knows how fucked up I am
Ia nefed hefelkp i am a taxi
We learned a lot about one another. I showed him around the town I grew up in and he informed me that he has had a threesome and killed a cat
You didn't even properly utilize my pigtails.
i know you're at the dentist, but this dick pic was too phenominal to wait and i deserve immediate tit compensation
I call BS on that! THAT WAS TOTALLY AN INTERCEPTION. JENNINGS HAD THAT.
PEOPLE ARE FLIPPING FURNITURE HERE. IN THE ROOM ABOVE ME. I HEARD SOMEONE WOOKIE CALL IN ANGER FROM SOMEWHERE IN THIS BUILDING.
I'd be lying if I said I wasn't scared, even a little.
just because the DWI class is located at the University does not make him a professor. I was duped, he is in no way, shape or form a professor!
I'm such a good drunk match marker. You single, you single... Drunk friend meet single boy. BOOM illegitimate baby made!
sidebar: i fucked your brother last night
You are the epitome of what awesome would taste like.
You kept pointing at me and saying I'm getting chicken parmesan and no one is going to stop me
You should have just fucked me in the bathroom when you had a chance!
she was just meowing in the corner eating frozen chicken nuggets
Randomize
