You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
the sham wow guy got arrested for beating up a hooker.
im sorry but my first introduction to your dick isn't going to be a pic sent from the men's room
Don't blame the cocaine for your eating disorder.
I feel like saying your blowjobs are worth a burrito is not the best strategy to get him to be more giving in bed.
Clearly it doesn't get better with age. Just more sexual
Your vase full of piss was still at his house and he still doesn't know.
Well, I'm hung over and my penis hurts - two signs of success
Successfully put eye drops in while driving with my glasses on. Stoner level: expert
I don't remember much from my 21st, but my mom said I insisted on the fat guy taking body shots off me
Apparently I've texted the word shitfucked so much it auto-completes it now.
Who the fuck is "nick from the beach last year"
No idea hahaha...why?
He just texted me.. Should I ask where I met him?
i think it’s okay to see him. you just can’t wind up with his penis in your mouth again
gonna stay in tonight
and im a platypus. shotgun a beer and get your dick to this party. ive got some hot friends visiting
I remember that. We went to taco bell looking for pizza.
Randomize
