Def gonna have stinky sex sometime soon. GOT TO! she has eligible friends for you, as well.
Do you think Patty Mayonase ever went down on Doug?
This is evicking siegelnvs
Im sorry?
This is fucking ridiculous*
You all can go fuck yourselves. As far as I'm concerned, don't come back to karaoke.
I probably wouldn't hook up with him if I had to deal with more than his penis. i think cumulatively we are up to a minute of actual conversation this week.
Ok...drunk girls at the bar are charging $1 for motorboating. It's fucking WEDNESDAY. I never want to leave.
i talked to you about this last night, and you kept saying "he wants yo pusssaayyyyyy"
My roommate made me go home after I mooed at fat girls at the gas station.
Well, if he didn't want to get caught mid-gay experience by his girlfriend, he shouldn't have pushed so hard to do MDMA with me.
All I remember is intermittent flashes of being passed out on the side of the road 3 or 4 different times. And telling him to just leave me there and I would walk home in the morning.
Do you think I shall pursue this journey to the center if the dick?
I was proudly and successfully the first girl ever to get kicked out of a the bar for being too drunk last night. Loving spring break.
I just used the proceeds from selling my ex's engagement ring to fund my first date with another girl.
I just lost my handcuff virginity and not in the sexy way.
You offered him a “Sorry I Blew Your Brother” Blowjob. How does that make it right?
I promised him it would be better than the one I gave his brother which is really nice of me since their actually only half brothers and his brother is cuter
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