problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
ive been sending my husband naked pics of my whole body from my phone..its a work phone. do you think our boss can see? if so, im either getting fired, or a raise.
hey you didnt make it to our afterparty what happened?
Ran around with a boom box broke a trampoline float, had a girl lick my ear the usual
i tried to hook up with a mom and then her husband came with num chucks
did you seriously make the punch out of vodka and food coloring
his roommates said i can move in if i promise to only drink tequila the rest of the semester. challenge accepted.
What sexual position says im sorry for your loss?
the remote is under the fat chick passed out on the couch. Good luck .. and may god have mercy on your soul.
He stood me up and then his cat died. I feel like this is Gods way of saying he's on my side, even after the tequila fiasco.
Well, maybe we can talk about it over a drink and some crushed up vicodin.
Of course I'm going to see her again. She had waterproof handcuffs in her shower.
This whole pope visit thing is ruining me having sex.
he was the first penis i touched… i have to go to his shitty bands first gig, i mean come on now
in fetal position in his closet not sure if he knows im here... hugging his spongebob cake pan i stole.... now please come find me..
Sorry I totally pulled a home invasion on you last night
That was super inconsiderate of me
Randomize
