smell my finger.
we usually just have an Easter beer hunt and never end up at church anyways
Just had a flashback of you announcing "your nipples aren't that big for the size of your boobs, I've seen them"
My dealer threw in a "freestyle rap" today with my purchase. I dont know if I can handle this relationship.
Yeah he gave the rest of the brownies to the bouncer that took his fake
Just thought i'd let you guys know that my dad was roofied at a lesbian bar last night...
I haven't received a dick pic from him lately. He's not even my boyfriend and I'm concerned. I hope he's alright.
its like my brain is a tree and you are those little cookie elves
We're super invested in me shitting to my full potential
Did he think I was flirting with him when I ordered a hot dog bc no
Two things. 1) party at my house this Friday 2) what was the name of the Australian you fucked on the cruise ship?
I gave him a blowjob to kill bill. 2 of my favorite things.
I explained to him that me turning straight is a once a year thing. And this boy just happens to be the chosen one.
Pretty sure I got pink eye from the strip club. There is also still beer cans rattling around in my shower.
Great, now I'm picturing myself as a fucking garden gnome
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