Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
dear life, i get it, drinking is not a contest
I knew something was wrong when santa got arrested
Were not really friends so much as I suck his dick a lot
keep it on the DL tho cause i dont want it getting out and it coming off like i kidnapped her or something
When I got to his place, he served wine and cheese and made me sit on the balcony while he read his poetry to me. He cockblocked himself.
She is two pictures of justin bieber away from being blocked from my news feed
Thanks for stopping me from letting that 14 year old feel my boobs. Thanks.
Passed out in a rocking chair on her porch. Woke up to the tow truck taking away my car.
That bottle of wine took a part of my soul with it.
I just talked this guy out of hooking up with me and gave him relationship advice. Am I a good person now?
Please don't bang more than two exes at a time, just so I won't get confused.
Has anyone heard from Jamie or has she actually just been having sex for 48 hours?
I want to conceive our bastard child on an athletic field. Why can't we make this happen?
You just can't go back to being friends with someone after you sucked their balls
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