Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
I think I'm going to make a pina klonopin before class.
They're pole dancing on a handicap sign post.
If only we could all 3 say fuck school to be stoner flight attendants
I hate when people see you passed out in your front yard and call 911. Like what, you can't take a nap face down on your steps at 4pm?
I just did the math. It is, in fact, cheaper to go out drinking every weekend than it would be for me to pay for a legitimate therapist. What are you doing next Friday night?
more embarrassing than that time i showed up to class in my hoodie and leggings because i over slept, and then as i zipped my hoodie down i realized i didn't sleep with a bra on or a shirt
I invited you and you fucked me in the face with the penis of disappointment and shit.
She's crying about either her ex boyfriend, her one night stand, or her own puke. None of those is worth the tears.
I just made a drug deal 100% through snap chat
It was a "my chaser needed a chaser" kind of night
Life is when you're laying naked in bed, eating Double Stuff Oreos with your boyfriend, blazed as fuck. Happy 4/20.
A stranger came up to me, pointed at my drink and asked what it tasted like and proceeded to chug half of it and then walked away.
I smell like playdoh, sex, and ruined lives. I love the weekend
We fucked like animals on that lion king beanbag chair that your mom got you for your 10th bday
Randomize