U Should have said " it's ok baby most girls Sh*t when I do that.
I'm sorry. Both for you two breaking up and because I just ate some of your cheez it's.
update: last drink of the night and im naked in my porch hammock. life is good.
i want to swaddle you in tequila
i just complicated the hell out of my summer by fucking him this early on
We still going to Happy Hour
Idk. I can't because it doesn't fit in my schedule of sleeping or throwing up
I had to assert my dominance as Alpha Drunk.
Hey guy that stepped on my foot, don't slap my ass to apologize.
You were riding my three year old's train yelling, 'I think I can, I think I can!!'
I thought I could.
I'll ask around, all of my friends have girlfriends now for the most part though so they're all dead inside
the only thing I remember was some guy took out his fake eye to use it for beer pong
After we finished having phone sex he proceeded to serenade me with Ave Maria. It was magical.
He flipped me around so that we could have sex and both watch Die Hard... I think I found my sole mate. Merry Christmas to me!!🎄
Why the fuck are you playing with legos?
Why the fuck are you questioning me?
Jus had a dream that I borrowed bob dylans car to save us from a pack of raptors. Pretty stoked about it.
Randomize
