the crunchwrap supreme is the def leppard of the taco bell menu
which is why it's clearly superior
we'll penetrate his innocence with our dicks
One of her kids, Dakota I think, got stuck in a ceiling fan and she had a fit, thats when she found the penis hat.
blowing a .13 at 10 AM isn't nearly as cool as I thought it would be.
hot doctor. gonna get him to touch my tits. 'think i felt a lump' excuse in 3-2-1...
Let's go free Charlie Sheen and party with him
He just "revenge puked" on her kid. I think we'll be leaving soon.
We made it a contest to fuck on everything in your room while you were on vacation.
I'm so glad I got to use the word gutterslut before 11:00a today.
Before I left he insisted on serenading me with a ukalele. I might be a little bit in love
Yup. Dog walker, house sitter and mistress to the rich, bored and bi-curious. I've got a nice little operation running.
Current status: Finding an unwrapped portion of Subway sandwich in my purse at the pharmacy counter & picking pieces of tomato off my wallet while the pharmacist watches disdainfully.
Did you offer her some?
If only. Current status: Not that clever.
Just so were clear your wife is cut off from my dick.
Bear grylls would be proud of my improvisation. Just used her vibrator to massage my back after hurting it at work.
Our son just found our secret Sex Dungeon that is no longer hidden in our basement. He brought his Xbox and the TV down there he is currently sitting in the sex swing playing video games. What do I do?
Randomize