3:26am: come over
you purposely dodge me and you could have stopped me from leaving, you know how far i live. YOU come over
4:11am: mnlodp
dude I don't understand hebrew and I'm not coming over
I think I'm in Tiajuana
You are not in Tijuana. I saw you an hour ago
I could be
i just remembered that i beat off next to you while we were naked and passed out next to each other after last night... No Homo
I'm sitting by the window waiting for the sun to go down so that I can start drinking.
He tipped the stripper with quarters. After that not even the waitress would talk to us. I had to move to another table to get a lapdance
These margaritas aren't just going to regret themselves.
Well Its not like I planned having my potato launcher explode and burn off my eyebrow and eye lashes.. I still have my right eyebrow can't u just be happy?
I don't remember anything that happened last night past 10.. I made him buy me a Buckeye's Donut tshirt. I have no idea why he'd want to fuck me after that.
i mean, i offered you kinky, jungle themed sex. i don't know what else you want from me
It's just weird. It's like Big Bird dating Meg Griffin.
had a nice chat with the older gay fellow who works in the bakery at the new vons about vday...we both feel that it's a day of dashed expectations & concerns that we'll have to be cut out of our spanx
you were holding her above your head singing Circle of Life in what i assume was a Simba reference. then she smacked her head on a bar light and the bouncers kicked you out
do you think eating a burger while having sex counts as multitasking skills?
Just imagine a dick squawking like a parrot
Lessons learned from last night: do not leave me drunk and alone with strippers and a credit card. Let's do whatever's cheaper.
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