weddingsv make me drug and hornr
So not only just find my adoption papers that I didnt know about in my parents house, but they say "child shows some signs of mental retardation".
dude. FULL moustache. it was like getting head from Tom Selleck
Apparently I had an idea for a cooking show and then proceeded to throw cookies at people.
I wonder what chicks would think if they learned that when we add them on fb we email their bikini pics to each other.
He sent me a vid of himself jerking off. I hope his hands are the size of tennis rackets or it will be a very short date.
She ran over a curb, took out a yard-sale sign and hit a fence before admitting to me that she may be losing her vision "a bit". Never letting grandma drive again.
You passed out and I didn't draw a penis on your face. Sister of the year.
"What's your dick like homie" is not really an acceptable thing to say out loud
I woke up this morning and I had the absolutely horrific realisation that I am the human incarnation of scrappy doo
his mom fetish really needs to stop. this is literally the 5th time i've come home from work and there's been some random skank and her kids in the living room.
did one of the kids use their poo like a crayon on the wall this time?
I mean...he danced with his dick still inside of me. What more could a girl ask for?
Dude \nSo embarrassed \nJust sent a snap to my boss john and noticed my vibrator was right beside me
Ahhh, the bane of our relationship.... His mediocre penis
You can't say that. Only if you have peed on the side of the highway in daylight while signing Christmas songs can you say that.
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