And just as he was about to come, he screamed "Oh Christy!!"
What's wrong with that? Your name IS christy.
He then said, "Oh shit, sorry Julie."
So Easter dinner for me was at 4:40 this morning where i made Bagel Bites and had a glass of Chardonnay
ok, she started talking about how she swears her step dad killed her mom. starting to back out of this one
You need to get here now. Before they realize I'm not puerto rican.
Theres a picture of you hanging up on the wall in mcdonalds, i'm impressed
I held his ankles while he hung off the top bunk attempting to get my pillow that fell off.
I just watched dragonflies fucking. You can't match that level of geek.
Too high to move please buy hi-c and pour it in my mouth in exchange I will marry your first born child
IF I CAN STICK YOUR DICK IN MY MOUTH, I CAN STICK MY GUM ON YOUR NIGHTSTAND.
You said this was your mistake shot and then vomited on the tv. Never forget.
Well... I got her number now... I think she is a dish best served drunk
I think the pizza delivery guy is getting a handjob next door.
Why r u in my phone under "the last survivor"?
im about to bake her parents a "thank you for making such beautiful babies, ive had sex with all 5 of them" cake
He was laying on a lawn chair, fell off onto his stomach and asked, "where'd the stars go?" That high.
Randomize