If she's not going to maintain the upkeep of her vag then I'm not going to pay the rent of being her boyfriend
He was legit dry humping me to the sportscenter theme song, awkward i think SO.
The drunk teletubby stumbling out of the place tipped me off..
Are you pissed because you didn't get action, or the fact i got boned twice in public places tonight?
It was kind of like a train wreck, except alcohol would have improved the situation greatly.
Haha I will however wear glass and and draw a lightning bolt scar if you want to have sex that way, and that can be the only time you can call me Harry.
laying naked on couch sucking water through straw. i can still feel the orgasm from last night. thank you mdma.
Somehow me not being able to breathe due to cocaine doesn't seem very domesticated.
Just got motor boated by a horse in the street
Well, on the plus side, the hospital gave me a shirt that says "Makes a bad ass look good"
She was giving me head while we were in my tree house, my mom then came out to let the dog out so she stopped so I would stop groaning, was it good? You tell me
reason #1 why i should never live alone: i haven't put pants on since she left 26 hours ago. and ive made spaghetti 3 times.
I went to Walmart last night to buy some CDs--which is a sentence I never thought I'd say in 2016.
He plays guitar, sings like an angel, and acts like a gentleman. If I don't fuck him by the end of first semester, I'm dropping out
New goal find someone I love enough to use these Japanese pancake flavored condoms on
Randomize