is this the only place in the world where you can get shot on one side of town, and have to stop for cows crossing the street on the other side?
I don't know where I am but there are firefighters
She used to be a real nice person. Now she's just a dick sucking machine
You should seriously consider super glueing your knees together
The power of my vagina can withstand any attempt of celibacy
Some girl, somewhere, is going to wake up with my face paint on her vagina
I dunno. It's not as good as 'devourer of cocks' but I suppose few things are.
Koalas always seemed like really high little puppy kittens to me.
today i was walking through gramercy with a dress bag from David's Bridal and a bag of McDonald's. No guy would make eye contact with me as I scarfed down my fries. I think I was mankind's walking night terror.
you're no funn. i shall go consult my friend vodka on this matter.
I've done dumber things than this for flimsier reasons. Come with. If I pull it off I need a witness, and if I fail I need an escape plan.
I don't think he liked your vagina hand signal
I made it 1 week... 5 business days at my new job before sleeping with my coworker.
You took your pants and underwear off as soon as we got to Melissa's and just walked around the entire time like it was completely normal. We even ate pizza together with your vagina exposed. You're my hero.
look im sitting on my bathroom floor in my underwear snorting cocaine can we talk about this later
Just went to Meijer. Purchased furnace filters, fishing line, red lipstick and pregnancy test. And if my purchase alone wasn't classy enough, I took the pregnancy test in the Meijer bathroom because Im on my way to the bar and wanted to know if that was a good idea or not. Cheers to no babies!
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